So after a few drinks while celebrating Cinco De Mayo, I came home and turned on the tube. It just so happened that one of the greatest sports movies of all time was on, The Might Ducks. This has to be the 69th time I’ve seen this movie all the way through. That’s not even counting the times that I’ve popped it on for 10 minutes. Anyway, the few beers in me got me thinking about some of the plot points. The movie has serious holes.
When Stephen Herek directed this movie 18 years ago, he probably didn’t think he’d be making the greatest hockey movie of all time (yeah, better than Slap Shot). Unfortunately he did, and we have to examine it like we would Gone With the Wind. Anyway, here are my questions.
-Did Jack Reily, coach of the Hawks, start the popped collar trend? He was a bad man, It wouldn’t surprise me if douche bags wanted to be more like him and started the d-bag tradition.
-Why did Jack Reily coach pee wee hockey for so many generations? If he was so good, why didn’t he at least move up to high school? When his kid grew up, why didn’t he move on with his life? I feel like this didn’t get enough attention in the film.
-Another point on Jack Reily, why didn’t parents force him out eventually? “If you don’t think you can win it’s not worth playing.” What the hell kind of motto is that for pee wee sports??? That goes against every virtue of youth athletics, at some point a parent should have blown the whistle on that one.
-The Flying V has it’s flaws, if the Hawks were so good they should have been able to counter that strategy. Plus, why didn’t they use it before they were down 4-2? If Bombay was a better coach he should have busted that out before the game was on the brink.
-The Ducks quit on their coach, to the point where they had to forfeit a game. What the hell were their parents thinking? I would never let my kid walk out on a game. They’d never play again. How come the league didn’t investigate this? I’m seriously concerned for their well-being.
-How the hell did Coach Bombay let Charlie take the last shot??? In what league would you ever let your sixth best player take the last shot. Adam Banks and Fulton were ready and willing, they were guaranteed to score a goal. Charlie didn’t win, the Hawks’ goalie choked. Charlie is probably the most overrated athlete in movie history.
-What publication kept covering the Minnesota pee wee hockey league? Apparently they had a pretty good graphic design specialist because those photos were pretty decent for 1992. What I’m saying is they had to have some money. Who would cover youth hockey that heavily? Are people from Minnesota bored enough that they would follow this shit? That should have been a central point in the movie.
-Why was the entire team rooting for the Dallas Stars? Why didn’t any of them root for the home team? Again, the parents are to blame in this movie.
ANSWER: See comments section for another reason why I shouldn’t write about the NHL.
-How come Stephen Herek isn’t a world renown film maker. Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead, The Mighty Ducks, Mr. Holland’s Opus, Man of the House…HOW DOES THIS MAN NOT HAVE AN OSCAR!!??!?!?!
Well that’s enough for now. If you think anything was left out let me know. Regardless of the holes, The Mighty Ducks will live on as the second greatest fake sports team of all time.
Filed under: Hockey, Magic Fanatic's Posts Tagged: | Adam Banks, Gordon Bombay, Jack Reily, Stephen Herek, The Mighty Ducks
-Why was the entire team rooting for the Dallas Stars? Why didn’t any of them root for the home team? Again, the parents are to blame in this movie.
When the first one was made, they were still the Minnesota North Stars. Granted, they left town for Dallas in ’93, but they were still the home team at that point. Minnesota didn’t have pro hockey again until 2000.
I have not watched that movie in a long time. I agree about Charle not being a great athlete though. He had below average speed and less than impressive size, but he was a gamer! Of course you give him the last shot! With the game on the line give me Jeter over A-Rod anyday. There are just sometimes when a player just makes big plays when they are needed. Charlie is one of those guys.
Manck, thank you for the Stars lesson. I don’t know that, plus my research skills took a bit of a dive after happy hour.
You make a compelling argument Jeff but I can’t agree with you. Kids literally jumped out of the way when Fulton took a shot! The intimidation factor is more effective than Charlie’s triple dique.
The argument I would make is that when you reach the championship level, I will always take the dominant athlete over the “gamer.” Derek Fisher and Robert Horry have made some great shots, but the ball is always going to Kobe when everything is on the line.
Also, I just remembered that Banks had to be carried off on a stretcher during the championship game. So I was wrong when I said he should have taken the shot.
Another important point, Bombay was banging Charlie’s mom. If she wasn’t putting out, Fulton gets the last shot.
Awesome post. I’ll let the Dallas reference slide since the Magaritas were probably the driving force behind this post.
Anyways Gordon Bombay is a god and no one should question his hockey tactical formations or his hook-ups.
The Dos Equis has nothing to do with my lack of NHL smarts.
Magic Fanatic – He doesn’t always drink beer, but when he does he drinks mass quantities of it.
With Banks out, it should’ve been either Fulton or Germaine taking that shot.